The Tao – Superficial Pick Up Artistry or Serious Relationship Builder?

It’s hardly surprising that opinions of the Tao of Badass differ widely on the Internet. After all, relationships (whether you are getting into one, being in one, or getting out of one) are one of the most challenging areas of our lives!

Truth About The Tao

And uncovering the truth about the Tao is complicated by the fact that it’s hard to find independent, real reviews – because most so-called “reviews” of products on the Internet are just thinly disguised sales pitches.

So when you see something that says “The Tao of Badass Secret Shocking Truth Revealed!!!” you can totally expect to go to that page and be rewarded with some superficial nonsense about how good it is and a discount coupon to buy the product!

So where are you actually going to find independent reviews of this product – or any other like it, for that matter?

Well, if you look hard enough, there are certain places on the Internet where you can find objective reviews: and various social forums being two examples.

The problem is that even when you go to these places, opinions tend to be divided between people who say “It’s the most fantastic thing ever!” and those who say “No, it’s the worst thing ever!”

Clearly this isn’t much help when you’re deciding whether or not to buy the product.

Is she the girl for you? If so, how can you win her heart?
Is she the girl for you?
If so, how can you win her heart with integrity?

I’ll give you an example of what I mean. Read on…

On the goodreads forum, one reviewer gives it five stars and he says: “Badass is exactly that – totally bad ass! As a guy in my 30s, recently out of a long relationship, I’d literally given up hope… of picking up girls like I did when I was in college… then you could say I was a natural. A long relationship totally destroys your ability to pick up girls.”  I’m not sure what he means by that, and I think it’s a strange thing to say, but let’s accept that’s been his experience. He goes on:

“Within a week of happening across the Tao I could feel my personality evolving to the good old days… With the techniques in the course, I feel that women are genuinely attracted to me…  The Tao filled me with so much confidence I feel I could get any girl now!”

And then he gives you a link to The Tao saying – “It’s well worth checking out, I hope it helps you like it helped me.” For one brief moment I thought this was a genuine review, but when I clicked on the link it turned out to be no different to any of the others – a sales link offering a discount ( a discount which you can get if you buy the product from Joshua Pellicer’s own website).

So no help there. Tao’n and Out!

But immediately below this spurious review is an email that says: “I’m the furthest thing from a feminist [yes, this is a woman writing] but this was awful. The only time this technique would work on me personally would be if you were hot and I’d sleep with you regardless of how you were presenting yourself.”

She calls the techniques in Badass “fucking with minds”.

And that’s an interesting comment, because of course the pickup artists’ community, insofar as there is such a “community” on the Internet, has come in for some harsh criticism over the years. They sure fucked with a lot of minds.

(And the criticism is well deserved, in my opinion. Read a 2005 review of Neil Strauss’s book about his involvement in the ‘pick up artist’ community here.  Of course Strauss himself thought it was all wonderful – at the time. Now? Well, just read this. That kind of says it all!)

So if Joshua Pellicer, author of the tao of badass, is a member of the pickup artist community, then this woman’s got a point.

The million dollar question is whether Pellicer is a pick up artist or a sincere and kind man who wants to help other men get dates and into relationships? In short, is the Tao goodass or truly badass?

For me, the pickup artist community – which basically means the community forums where men go to discuss how to pick up women – are inhabited by sad and immature man who generally speaking don’t know the first thing about masculine maturity or how women think and feel – and I’m pretty sure they don’t know much about love, either. So if Pellicer is part of this, I’d never recommend his program.

Of course, any guy who isn’t confident with women needs help and support, but for me that help and support should be about becoming fully masculine, standing in your own power, developing self-confidence, and making yourself as acceptable and desirable as possible to women in a straightforward and clean way, without the use of any manipulation and underhand psychological tricks.

Even if trickery works for a while, no woman is going to be fooled for very long even if she sleeps with you a couple of times.

Sooner or later she’s going to realize that there’s nothing behind the façade, and she’s going to ditch you.

Pickup artists, made famous by Neil Strauss in his book The Game, were famous for negative sinister techniques like “negging” women. That means offering them feedback which could be construed as either positive or negative to destroy their confidence and make them more dependent on you. It’s a filthy little game: sinister, manipulative and totally underhand.

If you’re looking for an honest relationship, this is the last way to go about it.

Indeed, Psychology Today reviewed the techniques the pickup artists use, and concluded it was bullshit: they said “many of the strategies advocated by the community are not currently supported by scientific research.” In other words, they are manipulative and underhand.

Building A Relationship

To the extent that any relationship advice system relies on certain common elements of human attraction, then it’s going to give you an edge. Those elements are: (1) building attraction ;  (2) increasing comfort and trust, and (3) sexual seduction.

In fact they represent the natural sequence of human interaction, so one way of seeing the pickup community is that all it’s about is grossly exaggerating the natural sequence of how we build human relationships anyway.

The pickup artists also give men who lack confidence – and perhaps feel inadequate with women – a series of techniques and tricks which are based on those three stages of relationship building so they can appear competent and confident.

But I believe real confidence comes from inside you, it doesn’t come from using tricks tips and techniques rehearsed by pickup artists.

So, like I said, the question for me is whether or not Joshua Pellicer is one of these pickup artists or not.

For example, one of the techniques which can help a  man get a woman’s attention is confidence.  That’s because women like confident and assertive men. However, if men become too assertive, women are definitely turned off – for very good reasons. Because fundamentally women want to be cherished and loved, not treated like some subservient being.

And the very act of using technique and trickery to appear confident is a betrayal of any woman’s trust.

What this means – to me at least – is that whether the Tao of Badass is a product worth buying comes down to the content.

Is it pickup artistry or is it honest-to-God-relationship-building advice which both men and women can respect?

Well, I would like you to read the contents of this blog, here and here, because I haven’t offered a phony review.

What I’ve done is give you some detailed information about the content of the product. That way you can judge for yourself whether it’s decent, honest and truthful. And most important, whether it can help YOU!